Hashtag bashers. They make me think.

Facebook. Social Media. After so many years of being part of "The Social Network" revolution, subscribing to pages, liking pictures, and just generally soaking in the steady stream of thoughts and un-thoughts that run through my news feed every day, I still can't put a tab on what I really think of social media with regard to its actual usefulness. Is it something benevolent? Do I really have to be a Facebook user? Am I even making any sense?

These kinds of questions arise whenever I see something irritating/hateful on my Facebook news feed. Every time I see a message written by an asshole for the sake of pissing off people he doesn't like, I suddenly get yanked into a moment of zen by way of a hundred questions that can't easily be answered in one sitting. Maybe it's because I'm just being me. I love over-analyzing stuff. But only because I want to get the truth out of things. Why are people like that? Why are there some people who love being such knee-jerk assholes to things that aren't supposed to earn that kind of ire? Why are hashtags so much of a big deal to some people that they go to such lengths as to degrade and insult the intelligence of others who just want to share the happiness that they feel? Is berating someone for the overuse of hashtags a service to society? Are misplaced hashtags that evil? If so, then what is evil? What is right? Wait, what?

This is crazy. I'm dragging myself into the bowels of moral philosophy just because some asshole decided to become all self-righteous and insult hashtag users.

I know I should just stop thinking about this and let this go. I mean, after all, this seems to be a pointless exercise. Assholes will be assholes. That's how Facebook is.

Still, there has to be an answer to why self-righteous assholes feel like stomping people to the ground because of their skewed opinions. People just want to be happy. Can't we all just get along? And if we absolutely can't, why don't we all just block off each others' newsfeeds and get on with our lives? Don't we all have something better to do than to obsess over each others' online habits?

Why are you being such an asshole over a symbol?

Farewell, Tabulas. And Thank you.

Darwinism, the so-called law of survival of the fittest, and its existence within human society, have always been matters of debate for a lot of people, both scholars and common people alike. But a lot of people have recently been gravitating towards the idea that all traces of Darwinism have now been eradicated, for the reason that the existence of Society, the artificial construct designed to protect humans from nature and from themselves, has been so effective at protecting us humans as to render concepts like survival of the fittest totally obsolete. As much as possible, the social contract would have everyone live in total peace and harmony with each other without having to pit anybody against anyone or anything. Nobody would have to cut anybody's throat just to survive in this world. Or, at least, that's what our society has been created for. So for a lot of people, the apparent success of our society has eliminated all forms of Darwinism within the human race.

And yet, it looks as if society has not been a very good model for achieving those lofty goals of peace. For we still live in a world where ruthless competition is very much alive, and where the only way for anybody to survive is to start running at the very first sign of sunlight. Everybody has to work. Everybody has to move. No exceptions. If your methods don't lead into profit, might as well get rid of them and find something else to use. Otherwise, you will risk being eaten by waiting predators.

And it looks like even websites aren't exempt from the law of the jungle.

A few days ago, Tabulas, one of the few remaining blogging websites on the internet, went down for good, due primarily to, as the site admin calls it, a "lack of interest" by the site's owner. Whoever owned Tabulas believed that maintaining the site was no longer profitable, and that taking it down was the best course of action, as far as the owner's interests were concerned.

For the people who actually used Tabulas, the reason behind the lack of interest was simple: the website hasn't been as popular as it was back then for the past couple of years. The website was actually an aging dinosaur in the new and more fascinating world of Web 2.0. Tons of new websites with a whole slew of innovative features were springing up around it. Facebook and Twitter had become the new face of social media and networking. People now had websites like Instagram and Tumblr to meet their "blogging" needs (if you consider Tumblr posts as blogs). And the mere fact that these websites offer a plethora of content and various means of entertainment that required absolutely nothing but attention from the user meant that there was no more room for one-trick pony websites like Tabulas. Especially blog sites like Tabulas. This was a website where people had to exercise creativity and prose and actual writing talent in order to participate in social networking. And given that only a small percentage of people would actually be willing to create in order to share something, Tabulas' business model was doomed. No common person in this day and age of the 21st century would actually spend time and effort to be creative and write. We have all been held in a tight grip by mass consumerism and corporate media, and all they want us to do is to comment and enjoy and become the most complacent consumer market ever. That is all that we have been reduced to. Like, Comment, Share.

I may risk sounding like a hypocrite, as I, too, am a subscriber to these social networks. But at the very least, my sanity has been kept intact by websites like Tabulas. Whenever I get tired of being tagged along like brainless sheep in a pasture, I run towards my ever-welcoming blog and exercise my right to being human. I have thoughts, I rant and rave, I vent out opinions, vile as they may be. Because that's me. That's who I am. And my blog has allowed me to actualize, to coagulate into the being that I am.

Tabulas was the place where my soul resided.

But now that the huge mall of social media has swallowed and evicted my Tabulas from the slums of the internet, I will now have to move my operations somewhere else. And it's a good thing that the corporate giant that is Google has decided to allow us bloggers a small bit of breathing space in the form of Blogger. People like me will have refuge once again. And I hope that this relationship between me and Google continues, because, as gigantic and oppresive as Google might be, as long as it provides me with the necessary tools for my survival in this world called the Internet, we'll be okay with each other.

But just because I have found a new refuge doesn't mean that I have forgotten my previous one.

So thank you, Tabulas, for letting me be me. For making me into me. Without you, I would have never been the person that I am today.

Thank you.

Cold start

Blah. I'm done blogging about blogging. And I've done way too many introductions on way too many 'blogs' of mine. I'm done with it. So I guess I'll just go ahead and do the icy plunge. Introductions are overrated, I guess.

Or are they? Is it because I'm incapable of introducing myself right now?

Probably.

The main thing that led me to create this blog was, well, boredom. I'm really sure there are a lot of things that I could be doing right now. I could study my Latin, read those books that I swore I'd read someday, hell, even play those games that I swore I'd finish. Unfortunately, I can't think of anything among those activities that I WANT to do right now. Even those games. And that's what really surprises me. The things that I usually enjoy ain't working for me anymore. I find that to be really weird.

So.. what do I WANT to do right now?

I still have no idea.

I don't know what I want anymore. There's nothing out there that can motivate me right now. Or at least nothing that I know of. So, maybe I just don't want to do anything. If I'm not inspired to do anything, then I'll just sit here until my ass bleeds.

It worries me a lot, though. Why? Well, if I'm not doing anything, then I'm no one. People are recognized by what they do, right? Like, 'hey, that guy's a gamer'. Or, 'that girl goes out a lot, so she's probably fun to be with'. Or, 'look at that guy, he must be pretty smart to be reading Heidegger'. Something like that.

So what am I right now?

Another thing that really gets me right now is what I think to be a lack of personality. I know now that I'm socially-retarded. Probably because I lack human contact. And it's quite a deadly loop; I don't talk to people because I can't talk because I don't talk to people. This year, I've tried to break out of my cage by going back to school and trying to socialize once more. Sure, I've made some progress. But from what I've observed, it looks like it will be a long time before I shake the rust off. I need more practice.

But then again, I'm incapable of socializing because nobody is ever interested in what I bring to a conversation. Especially those of the opposite sex. I'm a conversational cul-de-sac.

And that is why I'm having a hard time introducing myself right now. If I'm going to attempt it, I'll just end up with: A guy who does nothing and can't talk about anything.

But that doesn't mean that I'm losing hope.

So I'm going to turn to blogging once again. At the most, it could help me point out the problem within me through a careful study of my recorded thoughts. It could also help me practice my writing skills. Who knows, I might actually become a writer. That would be another piece in my puzzle. Or, at the very least, blogging could entertain me and pull me out of my boredom.

So at least I'd have something to put in the 'interests' field on those social networking sites.

Hey, at least I'm doing something.